Auld Lang Interview. (Sir Laugh a Lot)

This New Year's Eve you get a treat! Abigail Taylor is here and she's interviewing me (Rachel) and right now we can't figure out whether it's going to end up as a sappy, emotional, weepy sort of post or a HAIL THE NEW YE LADS AND LASSES thing or maybe just a lot of nonsense. So this is for all of you who are struggling to stay awake till midnight and have logged onto your computers just for lack of something more interesting to do. ;)

last sunset of 2013!

A: Should I type?
R: Yes.
A: I hate your screen.
R: I'm sorry it offends you. "You offend reason, sir, but I should very much like to offend it with you!"
A: What's in your drink?
R: I can't see a bloody thing right now, but I think it's tea.
A: Could you see the sunset?
R: It looks like an abstract painting. No fault of the drink. I just have the wrong contact prescription.
A: How do you feel about the last sunset of 2013?
R: It's slightly nervousing thinking about it being the last one. But it's a very nice one. 2013 has been a good year for skies. I hope your typing is right, I can't read it.
A: Earlier we counted how many airplanes you'd been on this year. How many did we come up with?
R: 10 I think. After I forgot I'd gone to Orlando instead of Atlanta. That lessened the count.
A: Which was your favorite plane?
R: Even though it was a little awkward, probably Saint Louis to Denver because that's when I dropped Winnie the Pooh on that guy's feet. But that would be flight. Plane-wise I liked one of the trans-atlantic planes the best.
A: Favorite destination?
R: Romania. Although I didn't fly into Romania.
A: Did you have any near death experiences in 2013?
R: Yes actually.
A: Tell us?
R: I thought for sure we weren't going to make it on the drive from Hungary to Romania.
A: Why?
R: Because they'll do anything to avoid potholes. And there was the time dad was driving home at 2:30 in the morning. I also didn't think I'd survive that one. We saw one of every kind of animal on that drive. Unicorns and everything.
A: What was your favorite "first" of 2013?
R: Oh gosh. Probably an international travelling experience. It was a big year for firsts.
A: What happened in 2013 that you hope never happens again?
R: Hitting a friend's car with a friend's car.
A: There's a good reason I'm not a journalist. *thinking thinking thinking*
R: I thought you said "there's a good reason I'm not in pajamas."
A: What sorts of things made you cry in 2013?
R: Leaving people that we'd grown to love. Frustration. Unrequited love. Finances. "Saving Mr. Banks." The end of "The Return of the King." Andrew Peterson music. Hitting a friend's car with a friend's car. Watching friends go through painful seasons. Other friends dying. Laughter. Ok, that's enough things. Oh! Sophie Scholl.
A: What movie or novel character did you most relate to this year?
R: Probably Brother Tom in the "Hawk and Dove" series. And I feel like there was some girl, but I can't remember. Definitely Sophie Scholl... I identify with her because she was just my age. Oh!!!!  *bangs head violently* What's her name! In "While You Were Sleeping"!!!
A: Lucy.
R: Yeah. I'll fall in love just like her. Also Giselle, in a tiny weird way.
A: What tiny weird way?
R: I'm a little idealistic. Prone to break into song. And... I don't know. I always... I don't like the idea... welll... I don't know... I wish life was just like a fairy tale. I also really like "So Close"... that song, I feel like it describes my life really well. Well, my love life... which kind of doesn't exist.
A: When did you feel the most beautiful in 2013?
R: Hmmmm.... let's see. Well, when I was at the Gala at Bear Trap Ranch, I felt like people were surprised at how well I could clean up, after what I'd been wearing all week. HSLDA Christmas party was nice. I don't know if I was beautiful, but I was... suitable.
A: Favorite gallant act performed for you in 2013? I'm so glad you're answering these questions instead of me. I have such a terrible memory.
R: Oh this is a good question. I was rescued out of a Romanian creek but I didn't want that gallantry so it didn't really count. I'd have to say some of the small things that a lot of my guy friends did. The boys in my van on the SAT were always really attentive and I appreciated that. Friends remembering things I'd said I wanted to watch or read. Giving out compliments they didn't have to give. Things like that. Happy little things.
A: What did you do in 2013 that made you laugh the hardest at yourself?
R: Probably when I dropped the book on that guy's feet. It was such a Rachel thing to do. Also, I can really scare myself sometimes. Like, start imagining things in the woods and creeping myself out. And then I always laugh really hard. Or when I say something that just pops into my head and people laugh, and it makes me laugh because it was rather clever.
A: If I asked you about what scared you the worst, would that be the same as your near death experiences?
R: Well, it all depends on what you mean... I got kind of scared by the guy who was hitting on me in the grocery store, because he started following me all through the aisles! But I really was scared we were going to get hit head-on in Romania. Oh, it was creepy at the border between Hungary and Romania, when they took all our passports and took a really long time looking at them. It felt like "The Terminal."
A: What do you think is most different about you this year, than last?
R: I think I have a better concept of the different levels of relationships. And what a treasure a friendship is with the opposite sex, even if it never "becomes anything." It can be really encouraging and inspiring. Girl friendships too, but I already knew that before 2013.
A: Speaking of which, what do you most adore about me?
R: Your explosive goose-laugh. And your ability to say the right thing to quiet people.
A: Well. Should we end it there?
R: Sure. Merry New Year's everbody!
A: Parting words? Advice? Prophecies? Visions?
R: Okay. Ahem. First, "If it's half as good as the half we've known, here's hail to the rest of the road!" Second, never... *guffaws* Don't drink a lot before a road trip! And take social media breaks periodically. It's so much fun. And then, prophecies? Let's see. Umm. Some people who keep breaking up will continue breaking up but it won't be over yet. There will probably be 4 marriages in 2014.
Sarah breaks in: "Good grief! Who are you marrying off???"
R: I haven't done my visions yet. My visions. I see..... Sherlock Season 3 giving me an ulcer. Maybe another trip to Romania. I'll probably fall in love this year... mildly... I'm like Harriet Smith that way... just kidding... oh oh oh! I'm going to publish my book! I forgot to announce that here. And another vision!
Sarah: You have a lot of visions.
R: I see... salted caramel gelato!
A: It wasn't that good.
R: You had some??? *fighting for a few moments*
R: Well fine. One final vision. I see many more adventures and new friends. And exciting things. I'm making this all up on the fly. Don't hold your breath for any news. Toodles people. I love you.
A: *starts to say something*
R: And a lot of goat babies!

A tale of pocketwatches

"The stars in their courses plot against us!"

Once upon a time there was a family who was perfect in every respect save one: They could not reconcile their schedules to their pocket-watches.

"We shall be there promptly!" they swore to each event. And they meant to. They really did.

"We shall be a tad late, actually." The Outsiders learned to watch for this second alert--indeed, they came to expect and to plan thus, for the family always followed up the former with the latter; they were quite punctual paying this compliment.

More often than not the family rang up the Outsiders again: "If it isn't too much of an inconvenience we'll be there...well...to put it quite frankly, rather late." Which the Outsiders learned to take as a sign that the family wouldn't be there at all.

 In the end the Outsiders were always right, which vexed the family to no end. They certainly didn't like this brouhaha between schedules and pocket-watches. It was the family curse--how could they help it? They couldn't. So the family continued to make their promises and swear to timeliness and get everything prepared in advance, but still their schedule moved at a tardy lounge and their watches flew till you'd think the gears would fly off, and late the family continued till the Outsiders never expected them at all.

"Wait for us!" the family shouted. "We'll be there! We promise!" And sometimes when the family held on with their teeth and dug in with their heels and slapped everyone and everything together with peanut-butter-and-jelly so they wouldn't slide about so, the Outsiders would glance out their front windows and nearly have a heart attack to actually see the family coming up the walk at a fashionably flustered pace.

The Aged member of the family no longer checked her pocket-watch and merely waited for the summons-or-not which came unfailingly.

The Seasoned members of the family learned to formulate plan B's and C's and D's and E's and F's (and even H's---just for good measure) and never to fret about the Plan A which hardly ever came about.

But the Youthful members of the family (not the Infantiles--they were too young to have pocketwatches) would not give up despite the wisest counsel. As a result they were the voice the Outsiders heard on the other end of the phone, or the senders-of the texts and emails expressing regrets, and over time they became quite a bit jaded with it all.

"Why can't we ever be on time?" Some of them grumbled.

"Better not to plan things at all," the Thunderous one suggested.

"We can still make it if we all leave NOW!" the Optimist would say.

But inevitably one or another of the Youthful Members would find they had lead and steel in their shoes instead of leather, or their watches had sped along in a way abnormal even for them, and the jading continued because they had been going about this way for so long.

Then one day, ONE DAY, the family had had enough. More than enough. Several of them were in tears over another aborted mission. (though this time the abortion was aided by an Outsider.) One of the Seasoned Youthful Members cracked her knuckles. She cleared her throat. She straightened her spine and Harrumphed at the pocketwatches and the digital watches and the mickey-mouse watches which all conspired against the family.

And do you know what this Seasoned Youthful Member did? She sat down in high dudgeon and wrote a blog post. And she hoped that someone in the wide wide world of blogging might have a wee spot of sympathy for the family and their timely curse.

The End.
(but she still thinks her family is pretty lovely. :)

Keep Calm and....

Rach and I have been having fun making Keep Calm posters, so I thought we'd show you a few...

Our motto when sickness is in the house. :P

Think "Emma" ;)

From Wicked

The Battle of the Branded Tongues....;)

Okay. I put together this funny list  comparing the Halls' cough drop wrappers encouraging phrases and Bop-It's negative comments. ;) I thought it was pretty interesting....so here goes the Battle of the Branded Tongues. :D

The critical Bop-It computer guy. ;P

Halls' "A Pep Talk in Every Drop"

vs.

*bold lettering is Halls' phrases

"Do it the same but better."↓


"Don't try harder."↑






"Um, no."↓


“Bet on yourself” ↑






"Too fast for you? You're out!"↓


“Let’s hear your battle cry!”↑






"Hands not connected with brain!"↓


"Take charge and mean it."↑






"Dude, seriously, come on."↓


"You can do it and you know it."↑






"Hello? You're out!"↓


"Fire up those engines!"↑






"I remember my first time playing Bop-It.."↓


“Inspire Envy”↑

The Day of Leaplings! :)

I woke up this morning and I knew something was strange about today...Today must be something special, I thought. Quite logically, I rolled over to check my calender, and so it is! You see, today only comes once every four years. *Runs to hug February 29th* In honor of this very special day, I thought I'd write a Leap-Day-ish sort of post for your amusement.

Nope--it's not about these cute little guys, despite what you might think.

It is, essentially, a catch-all day for the random, tail-ends of the last three years. A glorious little miss-fit day, if you will. Leap-Year-Day sets me thinking in random directions, such as "If you are born on Feb. 29, when should you celebrate your birthday on the 'years'? The 28th? The 1st?" I thought this was a cute little poem:

The First 4 Leap Years
By Raenell Dawn, 2002

I'm a little Leapling, smart and fun.
When I turn four, I'll really be one.
I'm a little Leapy, with lots to do.
When I turn eight, I'll really be two.
I'm a little Leaper, with lots to see.
When I turn twelve, I'll really be three.
I'm a Leap Day Baby, and so much more.
When I turn sixteen, I'll really be four.

I don't know about you, but I love all these little incidental holidays--whoever thought up Leap-Year was quite brilliant in an English-Language sort of way.

"English Language? What on earth are you talking about?"

Oh. I'm sorry. Only the fact that English makes no sense at all and neither does Leap-Year...that is, till you turn it upside down and look at it and see it is rather helpful after all. :) But it is rather sad, for when I looked up Leap Year online, there is very little said about it. Really, we must remedy this. We must make it a happy day for all the birthday-people who are overlooked 3 years out of 4.

Happy Birthday to you! We love you even though the calender slights you so often! :)

I had a good laugh over the difficulties that could potentially assail a "leapling." See this bit of Wikipedia's page:

A person born on February 29 may be called a "leapling" or a "leaper".^[14] In common years they usually celebrate their birthdays on February 28 or March 1. In some situations, March 1 is used as the birthday in a non-leap year since it is the day following February 28.
Technically, a leapling will have fewer birthday anniversaries than their age in years. This phenomenon is exploited when a person claims to be only a quarter of their actual age, by counting their leap-year birthday anniversaries only. In Gilbert and Sullivan's 1879 comic opera The Pirates of Penzance, Frederic the pirate apprentice discovers that he is bound to serve the pirates until his 21st birthday rather than until his 21st year.

Oh oh oh! And this is the best bit. Single Girls of my Acquaintance? This is your year to shine...ahem...

Haha! Apparently by old tradition, women can propose to their men during the Leap Year. [And more specifically, on Leap Day] See this excerpt from the Wikipedia page:

Supposedly, a 1288 law by Queen Margaret of Scotland (then age five and living in Norway), required that fines be levied if a marriage proposal was refused by the man; compensation ranged from a kiss to £1 to a silk gown, in order to soften the blow

 This post-card made me laugh too:

 What a to-do! What a mad, merry day! :) I hope you enjoyed this rambling, crazy little post and that you might have learned to appreciate this quirky day all the more! Happy Leap-Year-Day everyone!

-Rachel