Otherwise Titled: In Which I Use The Word "Sex" Twenty-One Times
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As a self-proclaimed "curvy girl," I find the popular trend of embracing every body type quite encouraging. I was always that girl who knew it would be impossible, even as a skeleton, to fit the mold of "the fashionable figure" and as I've grown up and realized that such a standard is not the only standard of beauty, I've learned to love my body. For the most part. That isn't to say there aren't (many) days where I wish my arms weren't so flabby, my belly was flatter, my calves smaller, and so on. Because of this, I'm encouraged when I read an article like the one about a size 8 model who was angry when the company for which she modeled photo-shopped her down a few sizes, or when I watch a video like Colbie Callait's "Try", which features the singer-songwriter wearing no makeup and has has had over 21 million views since it came out a month or two ago. I think it's amazing that our culture (despite all the things in which it is failing) is finally scooting over and making room for girls with curves or without curves, tall, short, plump, skinny, shapely or dumpy, willowy or compact.
But for all this, we still have a problem. The problem is that the pop-culture is embracing body types all right...and drawing them right into the sex-appeal trap. There was an article published recently that made its rounds through my Facebook feed. This article was titled, "Modest is Not Hottest" and covered the fact that if you are looking to be thought of as "hot", then yeah, modesty isn't the place you'll look for it. She's really right. I agreed with some points this girl made and disagreed with others, but the thing on which I think we'd both agree is this:
The object of the positive body-image movement is totally wrong.
This problem was brought into focus for me a couple weeks ago, when my soon-to-be sister-in-law, Abigail, asked if I'd heard a song by Meghan Trainor called "All About That Bass". I had not but after she mentioned it and told me that the woman who wrote the song is fighting to "bringing booty back", I went online and looked up the lyrics, curious to see what a song by a curvy girl, about curvy girls, had to say to the world:"Yeah, it's pretty clear I ain't no size two,Wow. The joke about this song is that Meghan Trainor thought she was being counter-cultural. She thought that, by defying the long-held view of "skinny is pretty" that she was defying culture, when in fact she was only replacing the wrong view held by sex-culture with another wrong view. In essence, Trainor is calling skinny girls names and saying, "You're not sexy. I am." And the whole entire point of this song that was meant to break out of the molds, is that it this song is playing right back into the same mold. Girls don't really want to be told, "You TOO can be sexy!" Sure, it's nice to know that we have "It", but deep down, having sex-appeal is not the thing that will satisfy us in our quest to find our identity.
But I can shake it, shake it
Like I'm supposed to do.
Cause I got that boom-boom that all the boys chase
And all the right junk in all the right places."
Identity Crisis is practically the entire point of the downfall of modern culture. You want to know why traditional marriage is breaking down and we have states legalizing LGBT marriages by the bucket-load? Because we've been fed the lie and talked backward, forward, and from side-to-side that we are sexual beings only. Shoes are now "sexy." A huge floppy sweater colored like your grandmother's couch-covers is now "sexy." Morning hair is "sexy," breath mints are "sexy", Tropical islands are "sexy," chocolate cake (the cake, not the person eating it) is "sexy," and next up, they'll probably be telling us that eighty-five degree weather is "sexy". The adjective has come to mean the same thing that "beautiful" used to mean and that bothers me. When we, as a culture, believe that we are made for nothing more than sex, life gets super confusing. So I, as an unmarried twenty-two year old woman, am useless unless I'm sleeping around with men (or women) (or both)? Is that really what today's culture is telling me? Pretty much. I get angry.
Identity in our culture is changing ... only in shape. Skinny is being ousted by voluptuous and one day, skinny will reign supreme again, followed by another curvy-swing because nothing has really changed. Sex is still the goal of many of the people who are involved in the positive body image movement: "I am sexy, you are sexy, all God's children are sexy." There are some who are on the right mental track, but too many others are still stuck on the merry-go-round that is Trying To Be Sexy.
As a Christian, I've got a special identity because I know that I'm a spiritual creature and that I'm body, soul, spirit, and all the rest. Yeah, sex-appeal is probably shoved in there somewhere as one of my less-important qualities, but it's a tiny piece of the elaborate person I am...that you are...that each of us is. Taking out of the picture the idea that we're only sexual creatures, body-image would barely worry any of us. I mean, this current form is going to last only...what...eighty years out of the whole eternity I will exist? There's so much more to me than eighty earth-years, but according to pop-culture, that's all I have. According to pop-culture, my booty better matter or I'm completely sunk.
I think we've got something going on here. We've got people reevaluating standards of beauty and that's a great thing. But instead of purchasing "All About That Bass" and gloating over the fact that we actually have butts, let's fight to redefine beauty as something deeper than sex-appeal. Beauty is way more than whether a man will look twice at us or not. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines "beauty" as:
"the quality of being physically attractive; the qualities in a person or thing that give pleasure to the senses or mind"The qualities in a thing. There are way more qualities in a woman than her measurements, her body shape, and her makeup. And we'll never really change culture when we settle for anything less than the whole picture.
Your world is pretty small if you're all about that bass.
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